Arsenal prepare "SHOCK" move for Raheem Sterling? No, thanks.

What could be more exciting than raiding Chelsea yet again? What could go wrong? The recent success of Jorginho stands as incontrovertible proof that we can't go wrong pilfering Pensioners. Sigh.
You can tell that it's a slow news week when we're talking transfer rumours. It's 28 February, 28 days removed from the January window and something 471 before the summer window opens. With that in mind, we might want to take rumours of a move for Chelsea's Raheem Sterling with more than a few hefty grains of salt. On one hand, I've come to trust Arteta's transfer intuition. On the other, this doesn't pass the smell-test.

Ramsey, Sterling, and the Art of the Dive...

Arjen Robben. Luis Suárez. Didier Drogba. All gifted in their own ways, but especially when it comes to simulation. Few if any could pantomime what it must feel like to get shot by a sniper and what it looks like to flop around like an electrocuted fish in the hull of a dory. It's a pity that such thespian theatrics are not rewarded by the Academy Awards. It's more of a pity that those antics are so frequently rewarded by the referees. With that in mind, we have two case studies: the penalty that Aaron Ramsey earned against Burnley, and the the penalty that Raheem Sterling earned against Huddersfield. 'Twixt the two, can we split any hairs?

Open letter to Liverpool (Scousers, Liverputians, Mugsmashers, what have you...)

Hey, Liverputians! Your season is off to a smashing start, what with those swaggering wins over Stoke and Bournemouth sending you top of the table already. It's a sterling opportunity, I'm sure, for you to rise to historic levels of greatness not seen since the early 1990s. To let the opportunity slip would bite, I'm sure. It's early days, of course, what with just two results under our belts, but it's not too early to make a meal out of our meeting on Monday. Let's face facts, though, shall we? We're both once-great clubs perhaps more obsessed with history than we are satisfied with the present. With that in mind, we each have an early opportunity to send a signal of intent regarding our ambitions in the Prem. Let's get to it, shall we?

Ex-scouse me? With Sterling gone, will Liverpool target Walcott?

After the sale of Raheem Sterling to Manchester City, Liverpool have got to be feeling the sting of losing yet another dangerous attacker so soon after seeing the south-bound Suárez enjoy so much success at Barça, while they stumbled to a sixth-place finish. With Sterling's £43.75m transfer-fee in their pocket and the need for a pacy winger-cum-forward, rumours of Rodgers targeting Walcott might have gained new life. His current contract runs out in June 2016, ramping up pressure to get a new deal signed—or transfer completed. Fortunately, it seems that the winger will put pen to paper on new Arsenal deal in coming days...

Real Madrid's rapaciousness is to Arsenal's advantage...again

While our attention has been occupied by the Petr Čech saga, there are doings a-transpiring further afield that could cause ripples far-more meaningful than what's happening a kilometres away. I'm speaking Real Madrid's insatiable quest for galácticos. Having finished behind Barça yet again, they've been heavily linked with David de Gea, Raheem Sterling, Paul Pogba, and Sergio Agüero, and I wouldn't be surprised to see them land at least two of those players for a combined sum of £80m, if not more. Now, even a club like Real Madrid has to at least pretend to abide by something resembling a facsimile of FFP. Much as they've in the past two summer, unloading Mesut Özil and Ángel di María, they might be forced to sell galácticos whose stars have apparently faded.

Raheem Sterling, Wilfried Bony, and Arsène's sloppy seconds...

With only 78 days left before the transfer-window closes, one might be feeling a bit antsy about Arsenal's ambitions. At times like these it truly feels that Arsène is fiddling while the Emirates burns to the gronud. At other, more-sensible times, saner heads prevail and we realize that 78 days is quite a long time, time enough for a club like Arsenal to do a bit of shopping. I'm hardly suggesting that we dawdle and wait until deadline-day before making any inquiries, but there is a balance to be struck between appearing overly eager and twiddling one's thumbs. With an eye to recent windows, then, I wonder if we'll see Arsène pounce on a player after his club moves for someone else, much like he did when signing Mesut Özil as Real Madrid signed Bale and again when signing Alexis as Barça signed Suárez. With Raheem Sterling touted as the striker du jour, could we again see Arsène scoop up a player made available to finance Sterling's transfer?

Oi, Scousers! Get yer knickers in a twist over this...

Dear Scousers,
I come in peace, or more likely, you've arrived here suspicious at best. Lay down your arms and trust me when I mean what I say. I'm not here to wind you up—much—and any attempts at that are meant as playful banter, nothing more, nothing less. As you and I both know, we have a bit a of a brouhaha on our hands, one that means a great to both our clubs. Should you win, the fight for a top-four spot gets tighter than Dick's hatband. If we win,we get to brag about climbing to second. Let's both leave a draw out of this as I think we both agree it would help neither of us. What's it going to be, then?

Raheem Sterling's channeling a van Persie-esque "little boy"...

Stop me if you've heard this one before: talismanic striker grows frustrated at his club's trophy-drought and flagging Prem fortunes and openly courts other clubs, denying financial motives and emphasizing a desire to win silverware. If the first name that came to mind was Robin van Persie, congratulations! You're a Gooner to the bone. If the first name that came to mind was Raheem Sterling, well, erm, congratulations again. It seems that Sterling, who called it "quite flattering" to be linked to Arsenal, has taken a page from van Persie's book. It's not about the money, even if it is; it's about the silverware. Should we at Arsenal actually open our arms, hearts, and pocketbook to the man?