13 November 2022

Gooners, do NOT celebrate. We know how Wolves hate that...

Simmer down, simmer down, y'all. Just because we won at Molineux to strengthen our spot top of the table and send Wolves bottom of the table should mind their manners and keep any untowards over-exuberance in check. It's poor form. It's better to simply nod politely, adjust one's spectacles, and get on with the business of the day. Indeed, it is in fact a sign of one's moral superiority to not lord it over one's inferiors, to instead accept such outcomes as a reinforcement of the Great Chain of Being decreed by the Almighty Himself. 

All we've done at Molineux is maintain that Great Chain of Being. It is right and proper that we find ourselves where we aree, as it is our destiny, and to remind Wolves of that requires no reaction on our part. Does gravity celebrate when the pen rolls off the desk and falls to the floor? No. Does the moon celebrate when it waxes or wanes or, um, gibbouses? No. So too should it be with us. We should accept what has transpired as a natural outcome, nothing remarkable, or celebration-worthy.

Okay, to be clear, I'm not talking our position atop the table. I'm talking about defeeating Wolves. Just as they did when we beat them twice inside of two weeks in February, they misunderstand the nature of our celebrations. There's little value in defeating Wolves in and of itself; they are no more than a speedbump on the long race to glory. No—instead, we celebrated those wins from what they represented, each one guts us up to fifith place as we chased that coveted fourth-place spot. This time, of course, the stakes are just a touch higher considering that we find ourselves a few spots higher than that fifth place spot we eventually had to settle for. Courtesy of Brentford's amazing win at the Etihad, we went into Molineux knowing that we had a chance to go five points clear for the next six weeks, long enough to celebrate Christmas.

If Wolves' players and supports can't see that forest for the trees, they should consider being somewhat less bad at this sport. This may come as a shock to a side that's only scored eight goals and won twice in fifteen outings, but people tend to celebrate when they win. Sometimes, it's because they've won a derby, and they've defeated a hated opponent. Sometimes, though, the opponent is little more than a burr in one's saddle. We have bigger fish to fry, friend. Don't make a mountains of your mole hill (Mole-hillineux? Nah). Get the bee out of your bonnet. Hey, look at it this way—find a way to beat Everton in December and you might find a way out of the basement. Celebrate that.

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